Fun Fact: Your FB Friendships are Comparable to Super Mario (or other video game of choice)

Sounds ridiculous right? But hear out the metaphor.

For the sake of consistency let’s say the game I’m referring to is Super Mario 64. The overarching theme is to collect all of the stars. I believe there were something like 200 total in the game. To collect them all would mean you’d completed 100% of the game. You could still win though without being so thorough. Obviously you’re trying to rescue Peach by ultimately defeating Bowser in the hardest-to-reach level. You don’t have to get alll the stars to obtain access to that level though; let’s say it requires 170 to open. So then technically you could achieve the goal of the story line without getting the full 100% of stars. Then of course you could be the apathetic gamer who doesn’t really care that much about winning but perhaps simply wants to have access to all or some of the different levels. This is the more ambiguous range because you could be anywhere from 15 to 100. Last, there’s the fledgling who has just begun and only has 2 or 3 stars to their name. 

Here comes the comparison: on Facebook the people you know the best are the ones whose profiles you have almost if not complete access to. They’re your 100%, I beat the game and surpassed all obstacles kind of friends. Chances are you have a really high count of mutual friends, which means that your ability to see tagged photos is exponentially higher. You won’t be closed out to the tagged photos in albums made private to friends only, nor will you be shut out from “View Tagged Photos of _______” in the first place. Close friends linger somewhere in that 170 star range after which things tend to get sticky. You start getting limited profile status (aka apathetic gamer level). Tagged photos aren’t an option, you can only browse their prof pics, and maybe you’re not given access to all their albums. This is the range you’d expect for close casuals, members of a club you’re not all that enthusiastic about, or people you’re looking to limit (the kids you babysat, their parents, the random former teacher, vindictive exes). Finally, there’s the tell-tale “We probably shouldn’t be friends since we’ve met exactly once, but I’m hoping to glean some valuable information from this friend request/acceptance”. You’ve just started the game with them, meaning you have the annoying limitation of 1.5 mutual friends and access to exactly 2 photos out of the 1,476 they’ve allegedly been tagged in.


Better start logging some hours if they’re worth beating-the-game status…


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